Marry Me, Jackson (Best Friends To Forever Book 1) Page 21

  She didn’t know who Jackson was anymore.

  Chapter 16

  “I don’t want to get up,” Emily mumbled to Sasha the next morning. Snuggling deeper under the light blanket, she flipped over onto her tummy. Thank goodness this wasn’t a walking day. “My heart’s been run over by a truck.”

  Sasha had no sympathy for her. Breakfast was all she wanted. That swish of her tail said Get your lazy butt out of bed. What did a cat care if the man Emily had feelings for, real feelings, had been lying to her all along?

  “I know you liked him, but Jackson’s not what we thought he was,” she told her feline roommate. “He didn’t tell me the truth.” And oh, how that stung. Sick to her stomach after watching Jackson with the Pomeroy brothers, she’d left the open house.

  Burying her damp nose near Emily’s ear, Sasha gave a sympathy sniff. Then she flopped over on her back. Once you pet my silky fur, you'll feed me. Works every time.

  Her cat had trained Emily well. Feeling emotionally bruised, she sank her right hand into Sasha’s fur. Now we’re getting somewhere. Can you make it to your feet? My food’s in the kitchen. Her tongue rasped across Emily’s hand in encouragement.

  “Oh, all right.” Throwing back the covers, she rolled out of bed. Sasha was already at the door, checking to make sure Emily followed. Pulling a hoodie over her sleep shirt, Emily padded to the kitchen.

  Feeling like a total train wreck, she sprinkled food into Sasha’s dish, started her coffee and set her oatmeal on the stove to cook. Her head pounded. Word like lies and imposter ricocheted through her mind.

  Memories of that kiss almost salved the hurt. But not quite.

  She wished she hadn’t liked it so much.

  She wished it hadn’t ended so soon.

  Coffee scented the air. Burned coffee. She checked her own machine. Nope. Nothing happening there. Her nose wrinkled.

  Trotting out to the living room, she glanced down on Main Street. Cars filled every diagonal parking spot from corner to corner. Victoria was a huge success. How bad was this that Emily could not feel good for her? How would Victoria feel if she knew Jackson had been kissing his former friend?

  Former friend. Her heart had shuttered. She was going to miss Jackson. Steady and true. She’d trusted him in the role of friend. Now she didn’t know who he was. She was left missing the old Jackson, the guy she’d known for years.

  But what did she know now? She hadn’t been around for a long time, maybe too long. Hadn’t seen him change into this other person. When she ran into him at Buster’s, he’d been with Victoria.

  Victoria. She’d been victorious all right.

  Something was burning, probably her oatmeal. Taking the pan to the sink, she dumped the mess into the garbage disposal. Emily didn’t feel like eating anyway. Her almond mocha coffee was ready and she took her mug to the rocker by the window. Sun was shining on the square. Through the trees, she could see the fountain and almost feel the spray on her face.

  Maybe she’d walk down to the marina and stake out one of the huge swings. Let her life drift for a day. She sure wasn’t making any headway here, that’s for sure. No way could she organize her thoughts and work on Healthy Eating, Better Life.

  Down below, car doors slammed and people spilled into Victoria’s Pantry. Was that a line out the door? She bopped her head on the glass trying to see what was happening on the sidewalk below. Although she didn’t want to spend the day drooling over Victoria’s success, a peek wouldn’t hurt.

  But looking did hurt and it hurt bad.

  Emily felt like an idiot, bringing Trevor to the open house. What must he think of her? She had to text him and apologize. But after she found her phone buried deep in her tote, she couldn’t find the words. Not now. Maybe never. Bryn and Josie had sent multiple messages. They all boiled down to one thing. Call me. She set the phone aside.

  Scooping her ratty hair onto her head, she made another cup of coffee and collapsed in her office chair. But the cursor blinked back at her from an empty page. What could she possibly write today about healthy foods when her mind was filled with buttery scones?

  Buttery scones and a kiss so perfect that it had ripped the heart out of her chest.

  Jackson had her heart.

  The realization shook her.

  She was in love with the boy she used to know. Could she love the man he’d become? She had to get out of this building. Emily wanted to feel the sea breeze whipping her hair, cleansing her confused mind. Troubled didn’t begin to describe her feelings.

  Last night Jackson had rescued her from the worst panic attack ever. And then he rocked her world with that kiss. Well, more than that kiss. The world-shifting feelings she’d experienced told her that much.

  Jackson hadn’t just touched her lips. He’d touched her heart.

  For a few seconds, she relived the evening. At least Miss Charlotte was happy. Vince had left with her, very happy about running “Lottie,” as he called her, home.

  But Emily was left with nothing.

  Had she been a fool to come back to Sweetwater Creek?

  Ten minutes later, dressed in cutoffs and a torn T-shirt, she set off for the marina. She didn’t want to talk to Josie or Bryn. Not in this confused state. A floppy hat and huge dark glasses ensured that no one would notice her.

  As she power walked down the cobblestone streets, she couldn’t help but wonder at spring, which had come into bloom all around her. The sun had gained strength and she wished she’d worn sunblock. But a few freckles wouldn’t hurt. Wisteria clung to a trellis and wound through some trees, perfuming the air with its intoxicating scent. In Atlanta, she’d driven out to a suburb one day to find a park with wisteria just like this. But she’d come home disappointed.

  Maybe her return to Sweetwater Creek would leave her disappointed too. Maybe you really can’t go home again. Did she fit in here? Sure didn’t feel like it. Heck, she’d made a total mess of dating.

  When she reached the waterfront, a stiff breeze had kicked up. Was rain in the forecast? Heavy gray clouds scudded across the sky. Some of the fishing boats were still docked, so the fishermen had been watching the weather. Settling onto one of the long wooden swings, she pushed back until the swing rocked with a gentle, squeaky rhythm.

  Slow down, heart. She pressed a palm to her chest.

  Would this heavy weight ever be lifted?

  Nothing would be the same. Ever.

  The friendship she thought she had with Jackson was gone. Shattered by a kiss, leaving her with nothing. Had the new Jackson or the old Jackson kissed her? How could she feel so consumed by a man she didn’t really know?

  Hunched at the end of the pier, a man leaned on the railing, looking totally dejected. Maybe she wasn’t the only one having a bad day.

  The stiff wind blew hair into her eyes, She pulled back the strands and watched the boats plowing their way back to the marina through choppy water. No fishing today. Not if you wanted to keep your boat safe. And the fishermen of Sweetwater Creek didn’t have extra cash to repair a bashed up boat. Some probably couldn’t afford insurance.

  One foot on the ground and the other tucked under her, Emily watched the sky. Her life felt as knotted as the fishing line she used to haul in after a disastrous pitch into the water. Daddy would sit her down and coach her. “One knot at a time, Em,” he’d say.

  Boots stood in front of her. Familiar boots.

  One hand flattened on her hat, she glanced up. How she wished her heart wouldn’t break just looking at him. “Jackson?” His name was a wispy plea.

  “Mind if I sit down?”

  Emily had never seen him like this. Pale and haggard.

  “Sure.” She scooted over.

  For a few seconds they rocked. In front of them a storm brewed. “Are you going incognito today?” Turning, he flipped the brim of her hat.

  She swatted at his hand. “Don’t make jokes.”

  “A penny for your thoughts, Princess.”

  She drew tighter
into the corner. “Trust me, they’re not worth a penny.”

  “I don’t believe that for a minute.” Jackson leaned forward, elbows on his thighs. “So, what’s up? Did your new boyfriend up and leave you? I suppose he wasn’t too happy.”

  “He’s not my boyfriend. But he is a nice guy.”

  “Yep.” He nodded. “Trevor did seem nice.”

  “So now you’re scouting out my boyfriends?”

  “...who aren’t boyfriends,” Jackson corrected her.

  “Right. He was a prospect, as you put it. Except he’s allergic to cats.”

  Jackson snorted. “Well, there are pills for that.”

  “You’ve got an answer for everything.” But not the answer I need to hear. “So I guess the opening was a big success.”

  “I wanted to talk to you about that...” he began while she trembled.

  Up above, thunder broke. Lightning cut a jagged path across the horizon.

  “Don’t bother. I can see it with my own eyes. And I clearly heard Victor Pomeroy’s words. He’ll be delighted to have you in the family.”

  Jackson jammed a hand through his hair. “Emily, you’ve got this all wrong. No way am I ever going to be Victor Pomeroy's son-in-law, although, yes, I think he'd like that.” He went to stretch an arm behind her but she coiled her body tighter.

  “Don’t touch me.”

  He shrank back. If she hadn’t been so angry, she would have felt sorry for him. “All right. But I’m going to say my piece, Emily Sommers. And you are going to hear whether you like it or not. Victoria and I don’t have anything going on.”

  “I don’t believe it.”

  Fat raindrops hit her cheeks. At least, she thought that was the rain. “You lied to me. You never told me about your success. Instead, you purposely misled me. Call Your Brother is just one of the many companies you've spun off into one of those billionaire type successes. You’ve probably been on TV.”

  One glance at his face told her that was the truth. Jackson hesitated as if he were about to be thrown into the riled water slapping the concrete wall. “I wanted to be the boy you knew. The guy you kidded with, felt comfortable with. I wanted to be that kid again, trick or treating with you in those oversized costumes that we dragged through the grass.”

  The tears did start then. She’d never been able to cry and look pretty. “I wanted to be the man you laughed with in the college library when the librarians threatened to toss us out.”

  She inhaled a sob. His words brought that all back, so sweet, so real, so heartbreakingly innocent. “But you’re not that boy. Not anymore. And I don’t know who you are. I’ve seen your house, you know.”

  Why had she let that slip? “I should have known the truth just looking at that...mansion.” She kicked that word right in the teeth.

  He was laughing. “Don’t you laugh at me, Jackson. Don’t you dare.”

  Jackson held an arm out and that’s when she saw it. Her scrunchie on his wrist. “I’ve been wearing this on my wrist ever since that night. Maximillian wants it back to play with.”

  “Wait a minute. You’ve been wearing my hair band around?”

  “Right.” Stretching it out, he let it snap back on his wrist. “It’s a reminder. Makes me feel bad and gives me a laugh every time I touch it. I realized it was you in the darkness that night. But I didn’t know why.”

  “And you never asked?” Maybe that was a good thing because how could she have explained that crazy night with Josie?

  “Please look at me.” With an exasperated growl, Jackson reached for her. Emily had to face him. And she didn’t want to shake him off. Couldn’t. His hands were so gentle, so welcome. The rain began falling in sheets, plastering his hair to his skull. She probably looked just as bad in that silly hat. Good thing she hadn’t worn mascara.

  “I have been waiting for you...for how many years, I don’t even know.” His fingers opened and closed. “But you were always onto some new man. Some guy who was smooth and a sweet talker, in a way I never could be.”

  Now, that was horrifying. “Why would you think I wanted someone like that?”

  He ran a hand through his wet hair. “Because those were the guys you were always baking cookies for. Went to dances with while I watched, wondering what the heck you were doing.”

  “Here.” He dug out his phone and thumbed through some screens of photos.” “Look. There’s a reason why I’ve carried this around all these years.” Jackson held out the phone.

  In the picture, she was modeling a dress for him in the college shop so long ago. She looked so happy. So carefree.

  “And all I wanted when you walked in and out of that dressing room, all giggly and excited, was to be that guy.”

  “Oh, Jackson.” The words broke her heart.

  “But you were going to some dance with the wrong man. Again. Probably someone with rich parents who had other girls on the string, not that you ever knew that. How you batted your eyes and charmed them. After all, they weren’t Sweetwater Creek.”

  The words made her sick. She couldn’t even remember which dance that was. Or what guy took her to the dance.

  “So I set out to conquer this town. To become one of those men.”

  “That’s not true. That’s not me.” But inside she knew it was. Or at least, it had been her.

  “So where did you go after graduation? Did you come home?” By this time they were shouting over the slash of the rain and the roll of thunder.

  “There were no jobs here.” Her voice was getting hoarse.

  “Has that changed?”

  Emily ran a hand over her wet cheeks. “No.”

  “And you’re making your life here. With people who love you. I love you, Emily Sommers. But I’m not the man you’ll plan your future with. I don’t fit your mold, whatever that is.”

  Dropping his hands, he stared out into the rain at the boats bobbing in the thrashing waters. “And I wonder why I care so much. You don’t trust me and you don’t seem to want me.” His eyes hollowed out and haunted, Jackson lurched to his feet.

  She watched him walk away. Her feet felt glued to the wet pavement. She couldn’t move. His words were etched in her heart. And she didn’t like them. Not one bit. Peeling away from the swing, she ran into the rain. Home. She wanted to go home. When she reached Broad Street, the blare of a horn stopped her.

  And who could have blamed that pickup truck because she’d nearly run right into his path? Even though the truck slowed, she was drenched by the spray. When she reached home, she dashed upstairs and slammed the door behind her. She could strip off her wet clothes, but she could never forget Jackson standing there in the rain. The pleading in his voice and the words she’d longed to hear.

  She’d gotten things all wrong.

  And now how could she make it right?

  ***

  The rain continued. Staring at her empty computer screen, Emily was jumping out of her skin. How could she work her way back to Jackson and make her feelings clear? Jackson’s words ran on an endless loop in her mind. How she wanted to believe him.

  Like she’d believed Macon and Eric.

  But this was different and in her heart she knew that.

  Her life felt hopeless and she dropped her head into her hands. She’d been a terrible judge of men in the past. But Jackson was right. What existed between them felt real and precious. They’d grown up together. There were no unsolved mysteries lurking. He’d explained everything, although the words hurt. With all her heart, she wanted a life with him.

  Her empty stomach knotted painfully. How could she ever eat again after tasting the wonderful food last night? Bacon and brie rollups and soft buttery scones roiled in her stomach. She was going to be sick.

  But as she bent over the toilet, the sound of sobbing echoed through the air vent. Emily sat back on her heels. What the heck was this? Because she now understood a little about how this building was set up, she figured her bathroom was above the one downstairs.

  One o
f Victoria’s employees was probably ready to throw in the towel. She’d met Maisy and Darla last night. Fresh-faced and dewy-eyed, they were Victoria’s new employees. Those poor girls.

  “What will I tell Daddy?” The words echoing up the vent held a world of hurt. “What will I say?”

  Oh my word. The voice belonged to Victoria in all her overblown drama. As the crying and carrying on continued, Emily forgot all about her sick tummy. Shoving back, she stood up.

  How many times in her life had she felt like a complete failure? Too many to count. She knew what Victoria was feeling right now. Victoria Pomeroy might be the woman she hated worst in the world. She’d been handed her life on a platter. She had everything and dared to complain?

  Emily was going to give that dimwit a piece of her mind.

  Stomping down the hall in her fluffy lamb socks, Emily opened the top door. “You stay right here,” she told Sasha. No need. Sasha dashed for cover. If she knew what was good for her, Victoria would do the same.

  Rain still poured from the sky when she pushed open the bottom door. And she hadn’t brought her rain jacket. Didn’t matter. Nothing mattered right now besides giving Victoria a tongue lashing. She rapped her knuckled raw on Victoria’s blasted green door. Finally, the door opened.

  “Hi, Maisy.”

  The poor girl sent a terrified look over her shoulder. Emily was soaked through. “Could I come in? It’s raining out here.”

  “Oh, sure. Sorry.” Maisy stepped back. But she still barred the entrance to that narrow hallway.

  “Could you tell Victoria I’d like to speak to her, please?”

  The girl’s only answer was a bob of her head. Emily could hear the bell jangle over the door of the store. Thank goodness Darla was up front. In a second Maisy was back, her cheeks apple-red. She mumbled something beneath her breath.

  Emily leaned forward. “Pardon me? I didn’t hear you.”

  “Victoria is indisposed right now. She can’t accept visitors.”

  Well, if that just didn’t tear it. Elbowing Maisy aside, Emily thundered down the hall. The bathroom would be to the right. Another short hallway. Of course the bathroom door was painted green. Hammering on the door, she called out, “Victoria, open up!”